1.13.2007

Lessons From Madden '07, or, Trout's Saturday Playoff Picks

Before we get started here, I should remind readers that if they want any real analysis from someone who appears to know something, go over and check out Planet Killer. This weekend's posts on playoff match-ups and playoff picks are undoubtedly more informative than what's about to come...

The early game today pits a playoff choker (no, not Peyton Manning... Tony Dungy) versus a guy in Brian Billick who has shown he can win the Super Bowl with Trent Dilfer. Trent fucking Dilfer. Anyway, apparently none of this matters in the Madden Universe because Steve McNair threw and ran the ball like a goddamned blind man, right into my Colts defense. Second play of the game, McNair throws it right into Bob Sanders' hands, who runs it back for a defensive TD. And that was just the first of three INTs for McNair. Of course, because I pretty much suck, I let the Ravens hang around with three Manning INTs as well. But Addai, Manning to Clark for two TDs, and ball control were just too much for the Ravens, who lost it 27-17.

In real life, I know the Colts aren't supposed to win this game, but I think the strengths (Colts O, Ravens D) and weaknesses (Ravens O, Colts D) cancel each other out. And whereas Planet Killer points out the Ravens' offense penchant for coming up with a handful of big plays, I see the Colts defense doing it instead. Pick: Colts, by a nose.

What did I learn from the Eagles-Saints evening matchup? In sum, the Eagles have no offensive plan (this is even with McNabb) and Rextasy's Sex Cannon is nothing compared to Brees', which sprayed 5 TDs all over the field. Oh, and don't fuck around when you have the chance to win the game. In typical Madden style, all I had to do to run out the clock for a 35-28 victory was to kneel down (it wouldn't have even been that close if not for a couple ridiculous 70 yd TD plays for Philly). A Brees INT with 12 seconds to go run back by Jeremiah Trotter for the tying TD, a Brees INT in overtime leading to an Akers FG, and the Saints lose. But shit, the Saints are fun to play with in Madden. Spring semester assignment: lead the Saints to the playoffs in franchise mode. Pick: Saints, by a whole hell of a lot.