5.16.2007

Chris Singleton Was Better Than Barry Bonds' Brother

Which is pretty sad, really. Singleton's career line: 45 homers, 276 RBIs, .273 BA, .312 OBP--everything went downhill after his rookie year for the Sox. Perhaps that's why Barry's brother is running his mouth right now. Running that forklift just can't compete with brother Barry's and daddy Bobby's baseball greatness, so the only way he can get on ESPN.com is by saying something mildly controversial about Hank Aaron's plans to be absent from Barry's record-breaking night (I'm not unaware that Bobby Jr. is arguing more or less the same thing I did a week or two ago, but come on... you're yapping about your brother to the media? Really?).

Make no mistake, listening to Ed Farmer and Chris Singleton call Sox games on WSCR is 95% pain and 5% gratification (if I hadn't made that clear already), but about 4 out of that 5% of gratification is listening to Farmer trying to get Singleton to name names and tell stories about his (mostly) minor and major league exploits and hearing Singleton giggle and hedge and say that he doesn't want to name names.

One of the better stories Singleton actually did end up telling (he doesn't have many, I don't think--again, for pure entertainment value, as I've said before, give me Hawk and DJ over Farmer and Singleton any day) was about playing with (or against? I can't really remember) Bobby Bonds, Jr. in the minors.

Apparently Bobby Jr. was pretty bad--couldn't hit the ball worth a shit. Singleton said that Bobby was always bitching about how he'd "hit more homers with a better bat"... or maybe it was that he'd "get called up to the majors if they'd let him use better bats." Singleton kinda giggled and noted that, you know, everyone on the team used the same damn bats. Very true, Chris, very true.

Anyway, there you have it. Bobby Bonds, Jr. sucks. Go back to your forklift. Leave the bitching about Major League Baseball to anonymous, talentless bloggers like myself.

Oh, and nice to take that first game from the Yanks this afternoon. Dare I speculate that the offense is waking up? Maybe they finally got some of those bats they never let Bobby Jr. have.

9 comments:

Notorious B.O.B. said...

Nice how they blew the second game. Does anyone ever sweep a doubleheader? I dont think its possible. Fuck the yankees. Am I the only commenter (is that a word?) left?

Echo

trout said...

yeah, i think you are, bob. that's what i get for writing so many white sox posts.

Notorious B.O.B. said...

Well then I will just start commenting under different names so that it seems like there are more White Sox fans out there.

Edward J. Higginston III said...

Wait, ESPN had a story about Barry Bonds? No effin way! Two funny notes about Bonds and ESPN's mancrush for him:

1. They lead off sportscenter for the 465,072nd time with a Bonds non-story. This time Lance Berkman commented on his record. His quote was basically that it will be tainted because of all the controversy around it. But he felt that since nothing was ever prooved involving Bonds & steroids that it shouldnt be tainted.

Of course, ESPN has the headline running at the bottom of the screen "Berkman Calls Out Bonds" What?!!!!! I guess they just figure they can make up stories and not even bother to try and hide it anymore.

2. Last week Dan Patrick lead off his radio show for the 456,785th time with a Bonds non-story. Basically complaining that the media won't stop talking about Bonds.

Hey genius, YOU'RE the media and YOU lead off your show, once again, by talking about Bonds. Dan Patrick desperately wants to be Jay Mariotti.

Sasha Bolichevski said...

I totally like Farmer and Singleton over the TV crew. They might as well replace DJ with a robot that just repeats the phrase "I agree Hawk, who the best pitcher you ever faced back when you played?" over and over again.

Singleton has potential and Farmer is a complete asshole, which is awesome. They should just pair up Hawk and Farmer on tv and Singleton and DJ on the radio. I would totally watch/listen to either.

You know Hawk and Farmer's egos would drive them to about 1-2 on air fistfights a week. And DJ and Singleton would be great for the complete trainwreck it would turn into every night. Highlighted by bad jokes and vague, uniteresting stories.

Jorge San Domingo said...

Viva la White Sox!!

Smappy Hong-Socks Jr. said...

Very interesting read. Excellent comments, fellas. I say that we all get together and go watch a game.

Tra la la lalaalalala

Anonymous said...

Chris Singleton had a ways to go but he worked hard and made himself into a decent announcer. Hard to do that with Farmer as your partner. I'll miss Singleton.

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